Getting him interested in you

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Jul 24 '15 | By single_lady | Views: 1088 | Comments: 0
Is he interested in me? How do I get him interested in me? What are the mistakes that most women make when trying to interest a man? This secret is known by most women, but is somehow often overlooked. It is commonly caused by psychological complexes or inability to find a common language with peers and people from other age groups. Among some of the books from your home library that may be of help is one by Dale Carnegie called “Psychology of communication”, which I just started reading. One of the key ideas which I took out of his work is that if you want to be an interesting person, you must show interest in your opponent. It has to be a sincere interest in finding out what is important in his life. Recently I had a chance to test this theory in real life.


I was quite entertained to observe a classmate, after my inquiries about her hobby of guitar playing. At that time I realised that there is some sort of magic at play that effortlessly conquers the sympathies of other people. It is very simple. Just ask any question about a person's life and listen. Two ears, one mouth: Listen at least twice more than talk. 

The psychology of any relationship with men suggests that instead of communicating by telling stories about how bad work is, how much the world sucks, or about other peoples success and your envy for them - take an interest in his life, hobbies, affiliations, past experiences etc. Imagine yourself a small child, who explores the world. To a little girl it is all interesting. Male lawyer? Cool. Find out why he personally chose this profession? In what area is he a lawyer? Is it a difficult profession? And what are his hobbies? Just try not pour all the questions one after another. It breaks the natural flow of the conversation. If a man truly believes that you are listening and hearing what he is saying, then unknowingly you will become more interesting in his eyes even though you have done very little talking yourself. 

As a caution do not be a hindrance to yourself with exclamations of admiration for everything you hear. I understand that this sounds too simple. Perhaps you were waiting for a more complex answer to the question "How to get a man interested in you?". The truth is that everything is really simple, but people are used to complicating things. Give it a try. Stay in the role of the researcher knowing of the common mistakes that prevent incitement to get men interested: self-centredness, unthoughtful talkativeness. Try not to resort to the games of a 15-year-old girl. 

Some women keep talking about their problems. Yes, a real man should solve the problems in the family to protect his woman. But female issues in the early stages of relationship never result in men’s interest in her. If you think that it keeps the man interested it 99% of the cases it is because he is set on sleeping with you and is willing to endure every imaginable dialogue (or monologue in most cases) just to get on with you. And even if you succeed to keep him by your side in his mind he will always think of you as just that hot piece of ass whose shallow personality he is enduring for the sex. We all know what happens when the sex chemical is no longer in the equation of your relationship.

The thing is that a lot of couples actually consider this kind of relationship healthy because it takes time for the sexual attraction to weave but it always happens eventually and unless you have managed to build an emotional connection with your man in the first stage of your romantic affair it is destined to fail sooner or later.In summary, we went over some approaches how to bring men’s focus onto you. I agree that the opinions expressed in this post can be deemed one-sided because I myself am a woman. Therefore, I recommend reading other material you may come across on this topic. The basic idea is to motivate a man, learn to be sincerely interested in the other party’s affairs.

 Unfortunately, the modern world dictates the trends of communication between people. Following these trends can be risky to both an established relationship and the start of a romantic affair. Nowadays women tend to use the brute force masculine approach to finding a lover. This is unnatural and can lead to all sorts of anomalies down the track. Additionally most men are distanced even further by women who exhibit this behaviour. 

I understand the pressure that the society imposes on you but I still believe that it is possible to be a real woman who represents the feminine ideal in our day and age. Yes, it exposes you to the risk of being taking advantage of but deep within that deemed feminine weakness is the key to divine endless love that every man seeks. If your mindset is on finding the right man try not to give into the temptation of drawing an imaginary personality and putting it on a display for everyone to see. These personalities are often not the representation of your true self but are rather borrowed blueprints of unconsciously ingested information from music clips, magazines and social media. You will find yourself in a much better place as a woman if you follow your heart and built in instincts when looking for a partner.

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